Killing Zombies

Cocktails will be served nightly! Use this area for off topic discussions and to discuss the finer things in life. Great cigars, spirits, fine automobiles, motorcycles, aircraft, you get the idea!

Killing Zombies

Postby Captain Ray » Mon Dec 19, 2005 11:18 am

Killing Zombies is a dangerous, and sobering proposition. It is wise, to set down your mai-tai for just a moment, and consider what you will do when confronted by the un-dead.

We need to look seriously at a few of the myths surrounding dropping a Zombie.. and "dropping" is the appropriate term, as you will soon see.

  • Most widely spread, is the myth that Zombies feed on brains. This myth has been promulgated by that quack, George Romero, who directed the series of movies known as "The Night of the Living Dead." Romero's interest is obviously to keep the public misinformed so that you will be unprepared to deal with a Zombie attack. The fact is that Zombie's are dead.. they don't eat anything for Pete's sake!!
  • Lopping off the hands or feet will immobilize a Zombie. Bunk!! If you chop off the hand of a Zombie, it will use it's fingers to crawl toward you in order to strangle the life out of you. Then it will drag your lifeless body to it's head where it will bite you and turn you into a Zombie. If you lop off it's feet, that foot will attempt to kick your butt!!! This is actually kind of funny to watch.. but potentially dangerous. Unless you are an experienced Zombie hunter, I do not suggest lopping off it's limbs.
  • Zombies sleep during the day. That's just dumb.. Zombies never sleep.. they are DEAD!!  They roam the Earth in perpetuity trying to kill you and increase their numbers with a bite to your flesh. Nor do they have any aversion to light. If you don't believe me, look around you at Sunrise on any given Monday morning.. the Zombies are EVERYWHERE!!!
  • Chopping the head off a Zombie will kill it. Now how silly is that?! THEY ARE ALREADY DEAD!! If you chop the head off a Zombie, then you have a Zombie head on the ground, and a very confused Zombie body thrashing about.. It is funny.. I know.. but potentially dangerous.


The fact is, is there is only one effective way to deal with the living dead. Shoot them in the pelvis. This way, they may be the living dead, but at least the won't be the walking dead!!! Disposal of the Zombie is a simple matter. Pour copious amounts of gasoline, or Diesel mixed with dish-washing detergent all over the corpse body.. and light it aflame! The ash from a Zombie body has an unpleasant smell.. but it is basically harmless.

Anyway.. I hope this is helpful.

Oh... and when hunting Zombie, I would suggest nothing smaller than 9mm.. If you prefer hunting Zombie from a distance, avoid .223 or .243 rounds. While effective on a human target, Zombies feel no pain, and the round is too small.. I would suggest .308, or 30/30 for any shot outside 75 yards.

happy hunting!

Raymond
"I have been driven many times upon my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go. My own wisdom and that of all about me seemed insufficient for that day." ~Abraham Lincoln~
User avatar
Captain Ray
Veteran Member
 
Posts: 398
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 8:28 pm

Postby lillybets » Mon Dec 19, 2005 11:29 am

When all else fails....  Here is a number we always keep on our fridge
Attachments
pic-zombie add.jpg
pic-zombie add.jpg (39.09 KiB) Viewed 1612 times
Image
User avatar
lillybets
Seasoned Member
 
Posts: 100
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 6:08 pm
Location: Oregon

Postby Captain Ray » Mon Dec 19, 2005 11:41 am

Here's one I found in my house this morning.. A frightening beast!!

This one show's up every morning.. I kind of keep it around as a pet, and to experiment on...

Raymond
Attachments
c-zombie.jpg
c-zombie.jpg (253.75 KiB) Viewed 1602 times
"I have been driven many times upon my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go. My own wisdom and that of all about me seemed insufficient for that day." ~Abraham Lincoln~
User avatar
Captain Ray
Veteran Member
 
Posts: 398
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 8:28 pm

Postby StogieC » Mon Dec 19, 2005 12:15 pm

There I was...   Surrounded by Zombies...   All I had was a Spork!
I'll have what the gentleman on the floor is having.
User avatar
StogieC
Site Admin
 
Posts: 177
Joined: Tue Dec 06, 2005 10:47 am
Location: Port Orange, FL

Postby Captain Ray » Mon Dec 19, 2005 12:56 pm

StogieC wrote:There I was...   Surrounded by Zombies...   All I had was a Spork!



HOLY COW!!! What did you do? I once was attacked by a Zombie and all I had to defend myself was the femur of a fallen comrade.. man.. that was quite a battle. I was able to beat it back until it fell into a wood chipper.. to this day there are little pieces of that zombie flopping around... I burned up as much as I could.. but then I got bored and went back to drinking...

Raymond
"I have been driven many times upon my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go. My own wisdom and that of all about me seemed insufficient for that day." ~Abraham Lincoln~
User avatar
Captain Ray
Veteran Member
 
Posts: 398
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 8:28 pm

Postby ronlog » Mon Dec 19, 2005 1:14 pm

Good thing you guys don't see me in the morning before my coffee :D
The second amendment is our first defense.
User avatar
ronlog
Topic Moderator
 
Posts: 1050
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 12:30 am
Location: DeLand, Florida

Postby lillybets » Mon Dec 19, 2005 6:37 pm

It's all true you know.  There I was waiting for the roads to thaw so I could head to school when from out of the second bedroom walked this rather frightening zombie.... I never knew zombies wore pink, but it's true.  Luckily I was able to capture it's image with our high powered camera (normal camera's won't capture their image)  If it wasn't for Ray's quick thinking we would all be goners
Image
User avatar
lillybets
Seasoned Member
 
Posts: 100
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 6:08 pm
Location: Oregon

Postby ronlog » Mon Dec 19, 2005 6:43 pm

That had to be terrifying! Thank God you guys survived.
The second amendment is our first defense.
User avatar
ronlog
Topic Moderator
 
Posts: 1050
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 12:30 am
Location: DeLand, Florida

Postby lillybets » Mon Jan 16, 2006 7:35 pm

It's mid-term week for me and after being around a bunch of snippy witchy women that remind me of a bunch of evil nasty Zombies I feel like going shooting.  Who wants to come???
Image
User avatar
lillybets
Seasoned Member
 
Posts: 100
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 6:08 pm
Location: Oregon

Postby ronlog » Mon Jan 16, 2006 7:40 pm

I could use some target practice. :D
The second amendment is our first defense.
User avatar
ronlog
Topic Moderator
 
Posts: 1050
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 12:30 am
Location: DeLand, Florida


Return to The Aloha Deck

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

Join Florida Carry